Tag Archives: endoscopy

Endoscopy # 2

4 Mar

If I would’ve known that being diagnosed with Crohns disease would lead me to a endoscopy and colonoscopy every 3 years, I would’ve walked into the ocean and never looked back. (once is more than enough for a lifetime) It’s not that having the procedure is horrible (at least where I go because they put you to sleep) it’s the cameras. They reuse them and they are interchangeable. So what’s in your throat, goes up your butt.

I thought because I was on medi-cal that this happens. It turns out they do this everywhere! People have even gotten really sick from improperly sanitized scopes. I don’t see why they can’t make this situation better. Diagnostic centers can move you in and out like a herd of cattle. And after you had something shut up your butt or down your throat you’re glad to be herded on out of there. But why can’t someone make cameras that are for one part or the other!?

This time I woke up and was not groggy for that long. I was actually hungry afterwards, and my throat wasn’t sore.  The thing that really makes me mad is that the place is in Monterey Park. That’s where a lot of people Chinese decent live, with the REAL good Chinese food. Why does it have to be filled with gluten, and that damn corn starch! It’s like going to Santa Monica and not go to a Japanese restaurant. At least with their cuisine I can have better luck.

Next week is my colonoscopy, again. But this time I don’t know what to do! Cucumber Gatorade doesn’t exist anymore! That was the only flavor that covered up that gosh awful Miralax taste and texture. And BTW, why the hell do some men bitch about doing a colonoscopy ONCE! I swear some men can be pussy ass bitches (sorry but you know by now my site is not for kids)! My daughter had a colonoscopy at 2! Anyways, can anyone out there tell me what Gatorade flavor they use? I can tell you not to use lemon! It was horribly, ugh.

Upper Gastrointestinal Endoscopy PartII

17 Oct

The day before you have an Upper Gastrointestinal Endoscopy you have to stop eating. Sure you can have juice, broth and Gatorade but let’s get real it sucks to not eat solid food . Liquid Diets are a glimpse into a life where you’re always hungry and left unsatisfied.-to my Puter’s with a condition where you have to do this, my heart goes out to you.-I was dreaming about the food I would have the next day-I could still eat gluten-and starting to freak out about the procedure. I’ve seen those news stories and lots of places are unclean. Worst of all, I get bitchy when I’m hungry and the worst headaches! Liquid Diets take me to a place in my horrible childhood when I would tell my mom I was still hungry and she would say,”Go drink water!” That is the anthem for poor hungry kids around the world! Go drink water my ass!

The morning of the endoscopy I was thirsty and hungry and weak as f*k. When I’m hungry my stomach tends to cramp horribly to the point I want to throw up.-in school it was a nightmare waiting for lunch after recess. Remember that kid who always had a growling stomach, yeah that was me!-When we got to the place it wasn’t a hospital but more like a clinic where they move you in and out.-so many old people! That’s exactly what I want to see, old people looking at me wondering why I’m here!-My husband was really uneasy about the place, especially after one of the receptionist was rude to him. He wanted to bail but I told him, “I’ve come this far and like you said it’s not a major surgery”. We sat down and waited…then they called me into a room.
This is where they register you and ask a bunch of questions,-why are you here? Medical history, anything they should know, that kind of thing-then they give you a wrist band and make you wait, again.

When it was my turn to go have the procedure I kissed my daughter and husband goodbye, and was told I would see them in 3 to 4 hours. I went through a door into a huge room with beds separated by curtains and chairs with people waiting in them. It was really busy and I was really scared, this was some gastrointestinal clinic. I was starting to think my husband was right, but I’d come this far-also I puked up bood, I want to know what that was from-.This woman took me to an empty bed and told me to undress and put on a gown.-I really wished my daughter and husband were there with me in that room-I put my belongings into a plastic bag under the bed and waited. The lady came back with a tray with needles and one of those liquid bags. I thought this is it, no turning back now.
She told me to lay back and got the liquid bag ready. I asked her what was it for and she said it was fluid to keep me hydrated.-anyone really know what’s in that bag?-When she was done with the bag she got the needle ready and told me to hold out my hand. She stuck it in and hooked the bag up to it.
“You’ll feel a slight burning sensation in our hand as the fluid enters your body”, she said. Slight burning sensation my ass!-does anyone really know what’s in that bag cause that shit ain’t water!-She began cleaning up as my hand began burning very badly; as she was leaving she said,”If there’s anything I can do let me know.”I felt that fluid in my hand and crawl up my arm. It’s extremely freaky, and just the thought if it is making me sick-you”ll know why later-. I layed back on the bed and listened to the people being wheeled in and out. The sounds of people’s moans and farts. Yes, I did say farts!-that’s something else I want to hear before going in!-
When it was my turned to be wheeled in, I thought,”Where the he’ll am I going to go?!” Through the opened curtain and around the people waiting in the seats we went through another door. In this room were a couple of guys I didn’t see before and a monitor and lots of medical stuff.-it was freaky how everything was contained in this room-One if the guys was cleaning the camera because I could see it on the monitor. They said their names and said what they were going to the doing. They lady helped me turn on my back and put a mask on my face. I told them the mask smelled really bad-like airy plastic-,one of the guys said don’t worry I’ll be asleep soon and awake in no time. All I remember thinking was this shit smells really bad! Is it safe to breathe in plastic?

I remember waking up in one of those curtain sectionals and wanting to get the hell out of there.-especially getting that needle out of my hand!-I started thinking about random trivia to get my mind right. I was doing that Uma Thurman Kill Bill wiggle your big toe thing. I was ready to go. I started calling out,”Ello? Anyone, Anyone out there?” a nurse came in. I told her I was ready to go, she asked when I had the procedure I told her I didn’t know. She went to ask someone and when came back she informed me it was too early. I told her I was feeling well enough and she could take me off the fluid bag. She left and asked again, came back and unhooked me. When she left and again saying,”I come and get you in a little while then you can have a seat in the waiting area.” I thought that’s what those chairs are for. I wanted to eat, sleep and most of all get out of there. After a while when the lady said I could sit in the waiting area, my legs were woozy but I kept it together. I was waiting in the chair for about 15mins, when the lady said I’ll call your ride now. -you’re just going to call now!!-I had to wait another 15mins for my family, all the while building up anger of having to wait-also being extremely hungry-
When they finally called my name I jumped up. I said bye to this one lady who was cool and meet up with my family. My husband said see your not dead, I chuckled and wanted to eat!
I told my husband about the hand needle and plastic smell. He said that’s what the stuff that puts you to sleep smells like; they just don’t tell you that because they want you to go to sleep instead of thinking about the smell. All I knew was I wanted to eat and we went to The Hat. I was charged for a dip that wasn’t.-Shame on you for messing with a girl’s last chance to eat gluten!-They say you shouldn’t eat solid foods right away, I tried! Your stomach is still really tight, although my throat didn’t hurt. So take it slow with liquids as my stommy-stomach/tummy-was hurting off the bites I did get down.
~*~Gluten Putin~*~

Upper GI Endoscopy

5 Sep

It was three weeks till my endoscopy appointment when I was really thinking what’s going on with the laproscopic thingy. When I called medi-cal to make sure that the upper GI endoscopy was going to go through, I also asked about the laparoscopic procedure. The lady on the phone said the endoscopic was fine but they had no record of the laparoscopic. I told her that I had to switch over my doctors because Marina Gold was an absolute idiot and this is probably part of that problem. I was told because it was a serious operation she would look right into it and get back to me, when she got back to me I thought this must be a serious procedure! After medi-cal I called my gynecologist office and told them my insurance got the referral for the laparoscopic procedure. The lady on the phone said,”We’ve been trying to contact you for a while now, you need your procedure!” Then all of a sudden I remembered, my phone had gotten disconnected! Actually it was shut off but, that’s another story for another time, what matters is I had to change my phone number. She asked me if I could come in next week to schedule the laparoscopic procedure.

-It was around this time that the gluten and corn was starting to have some effect on my body. I didn’t care because I was LOVING IT! Eating whatever I wanted to!-At my gyno’s office which is ALWAYS packed I waited over an hour passed my appointment time to see him.-I will tell you his name when I’m done with him ;-)-When he was discussing what was going to happen I starting getting really scared. I hate having my belly button messed with! “They” already had to go in there to tie my tubes, I really didn’t want to do it again. At the same time, to finally know what was going on was going to be great! When we were done I went to schedule the appointment. She wanted to do it that weekend! I thought that was weird, I said I had plans and maybe after my endoscopy we could do it. We went back and forth with dates till finally the Dr came back. He said he wanted to do it soon to find out what was going on, I said is it okay to do it a week after having an upper gi endoscopic procedure? He said it would be ok and we set the date, which the lady already suggested.
That was that. In two weeks my endoscopy and in three my laparoscopy.
~*~Gluten Putin~*~

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